if this you, let me offer help!!!!!
i know how u feel, and i can't lie and say i've dealt wit it.
But there are so many things u have to do to get over it. i try to hide it by actin happy, and it works. but i can't fool myself. the first step is to walk out into a patch of sunlight, close your eyes, and turn ur head up. it helps, it really does. try holdin ur chin up, walk around wit a smile on your face, and the radience u emit to others will always rub off on u in the end. i just read this ova and dayam! but i'm not finished yet. mediatin, going into urself, trying to find wat made u like this, doesn't help. you need somone to support you, to tell you your worth something. nothing else works. i'm not gonna lie. find that person. tell them everything. it won't make you feel better, but it'll help them, help you. don't go to your counseller, you'll feel like an idiot and chicken out. i tried, and i walked away right before i walked in. it was probally a good decision. If you listen, and listen well, shadows will begin to fade, the light will always shine for you. and if you start to feel down. step out into the light and refer to step 1.

XD RANDOMNESS IS FUN!!!!!